You Aren’t Self-Made—Not Even the Part That Thinks It

Title: You Aren’t Self-Made—Not Even the Part That Thinks It

The Myth of “Choosing Who You Are”

People love saying they “chose” to be successful, kind, or smart. But here’s the truth: every part of you was shaped by things outside your control. Your genes, family, school, friends—even the air you breathe—made you who you are. Think of it like a tree: a seed can’t pick its soil, rain, or sunlight. You’re the same.

Even recognizing that free will is an illusion doesn’t put you outside of it. The ability to see determinism at all? Also shaped by forces beyond your control[1]. There is no part of you that exists independent of society’s shaping influence.

Why Some People Never “Get It”

Imagine trying to solve a puzzle with half the pieces missing. That’s what it’s like for someone raised without education or support. No one chooses their starting point.

• A child in a war zone might never learn trust[2].

• Someone raised on hate may never question it.

This isn’t their fault. Just like a seed won’t grow in concrete, people can’t grow without the right conditions. Not everyone is given access to the same possibilities.

Crime Isn’t Just “Bad People”

When someone harms others, it’s easy to call them evil. But harm is a sign of broken systems, not just broken people.

Example:

• In 2001, Portugal stopped jailing drug users and gave them healthcare instead. Result: 80% fewer overdose deaths[5].

• Norway’s prisons focus on rehab, not punishment. Their criminals rarely reoffend (20% vs. 76% in the U.S.)[6].

Justice should fix causes, not blame:

ProblemSolutionPovertyBetter jobs, schools[7]TraumaMental health care[8]Dangerous behaviorQuarantine + retraining[9]

Punishment assumes people have free choice. But if people are shaped by their environment, then fixing harm means fixing the conditions that led to it in the first place.

Why Take Responsibility?

If we didn’t “choose” to mess up, why apologize? Because it works[11].

• Saying “I’m sorry” repairs trust.

• Fixing mistakes stops future problems.

But responsibility is not about guilt—it’s about function. When someone takes responsibility, they are acting as the collective in motion—as society attempting to correct itself through them.

Justice should be about repair, not retribution. A deterministic worldview does not see punishment as meaningful—only re-education, transformation, or, where necessary, quarantine for societal protection[12].

What This Means For You

1. Stop blaming yourself (or others). Ask: “What made this happen?” not “Who’s guilty?”

2. Build better environments. Support schools, mental health, and fair laws.

3. Celebrate small wins. Growth isn’t about willpower—it’s about stacking good conditions.

Example:

• Sticking to a diet? Don’t rely on “self-control.” Throw out junk food.

• Want to read more? Keep books by your bed, not your phone.

Final Thought: Society’s the Real Test

Next time you see someone fail, ask: “What broke down around them?”

We’re all garden plots. Good soil grows good plants. Let’s stop judging weeds and start fixing the dirt.

---   Inspired by real change: Portugal’s drug policy, Norway’s prisons, and schools that lift kids out of poverty.

Tagline: “You don’t control the wind, but you can adjust the sails.”

---   Action Step: Share one way your environment helped/hurt you. Let’s brainstorm fixes together!

References

1. Sapolsky, R. (2023). Determined: A Science of Life Without Free Will. Penguin Press.

2. UNICEF. (2021). Children in War Zones. https://www.unicef.org/emergencies/children-war

3. Staub, E. (2003). The Psychology of Good and Evil. Cambridge University Press.

4. Alexander, M. (2010). The New Jim Crow. The New Press.

5. Cato Institute. (2020). Portugal’s Drug Decriminalization Policy. https://www.cato.org/policy-analysis/portugals-drug-decriminalization-policy-lessons

6. Norwegian Ministry of Justice. (2022). Recidivism Rates in Norway. (I couldn't find a specific English language link for this. Norwegian sources would need to be researched.)

7. Heckman, J. (2013). Investing in Disadvantaged Youth. https://heckmanequation.org/www/heckman/publications/investing-in-disadvantaged-youth/

8. National Institute of Mental Health. (2021). Trauma-Informed Care. https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/trauma

9. Cullen, F. (2012). Rehabilitation Programs. (A good general resource on rehabilitation: https://www.ojp.gov/ncjrs/virtual-library/abstracts/rehabilitation-programs)

10. Pinker, S. (2011). The Better Angels of Our Nature. Viking.

11. Harvard Business Review. (2019). The Power of Apologies. https://hbr.org/2019/05/the-power-of-apologies

12. CDC. (2020). Harm Reduction Strategies. https://www.cdc.gov/stopoverdose/harmreduction/index.html

Acknowledgments

This post was refined using insights from neuroscience and sociology. Information was sourced and cross-referenced with Perplexity AI for research and ChatGPT for structuring, editing, and refining key arguments. Grammarly assisted with proofreading.

Vocabulary Helper:

• Quarantine: Temporarily separate someone harmful to protect others.

• Rehab: Training/help to fix harmful behavior.

• Affordances: Opportunities your environment gives you (e.g., a library = learning affordances).